Hurrah!

All is well with Bubble. Growing well (no change to the due date) and nothing abnormal detected on the scan - and there is only one! Even I could pick out bits on the scan - the spine, the four chambers of the heart - but a lot just looked like a blur of grey and white. The radiographer did point out other bits - hands, face etc, but we just ahve to trust she knows what she's talking about!

It behaved itself well for all the measurements and checks, but then wouldn't pose for the photograph. We still got one, but it's not very clear. Never mind, you can't have everything.

It's such a relief that my worries didn't come true - now I can start to get excited.

So now we can get on with the job of really preparing. Mum & Dad are coming in a couple of weeks time to help us move furniture around, so we can start to get nursery & dog-free playroom downstairs sorted. The following weekend we're off to Stuart & Rach's to raid their cupboards for baby gear. And then - you never know - I might be able to persuade Dave we can do a bit of shopping!

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the 20-week scan. I'm still worried about it, still
niggling that something will be not quite right. But I've got to go to
find out, otherwise I'd just keep worrying and that's not doing me any
good at all.

I haven't really slept properly for a few nights (not just with the
worrying - bad hotel beds don't help either!) and now I'm tired as
well, which doesn't help the emotions. It's not taking much to set the
tears flowing. I'm trying to be positive, but for some reason it's
difficult. Hopefully I'll have more cheerful things to say tomorrow.

20-week scan

We've got the 20-week scan next Tuesday, and for the last couple of
days I've had niggling worries about it. Don't really know what about
it. Kind of the "What if..." thing, I think. I woke up last night and
was laid awake for a bit thinking about it. I really want it, because
I want to see Bubble, but I guess I'm scared that there's something
that I'm not going to like. I've got no groundings for this at all,
and maybe it's just me.
I mentioned it at the yoga class today, and it was pointed out that I
don't have to have it if I don't want it. Should I have it to set any
worries to rest? Should I not have it and just trust that nature will
make it's own way and everything will sort itself out?
I know Dave is looking forward to it, but I just don't know. It's all
quite scary - more so than the 12-week one, for some reason - and I
don't know what to think.

Yoga Classes

Been to my first pregnancy yoga class this afternoon. It's run by
Olivia, a woman trained under the Active Birth Centre
(www.activebirthcentre.com) and is designed to prepare you for labour,
birth and early parenting. Some gentle exercises, massage and
relaxation and then a chat over a cup of lemon and ginger tea! I've
never been to anything like this before, but everyone was friendly
enough and it wasn't too strenuous (although I'm aching just a little
bit!) I felt like the baby of the class - everyone else's babies are
due before the end of the year, so I'm quite a long way behind them,
but I've been reassured that new people join the class all the time,
so I'll soon feel like an old hand!

Bubble flutters

Over the past few days I've been feeling flutterings. Difficult to
describe really - a bit like gentle bowel movements, or butterflies.
People tell me that it's probably the first movements of the baby.
Great! It's not that often, and they're really faint - I have to be
quite relaxed and still to feel them at all. I'm hoping that it bodes
well for the future - a nice quite baby who isn't too much of a pest!!
Hmm, somehow I think not!

On a slightly different note, I'm having to spend money on clothes. I
bought a few bits a couple of weeks ago, but need more. This morning
at church I had a normal t-shirt (no maternity tops clean) on with a
cardigan over the top. I felt hot, but couldn't take the cardie off
'cos the t-shirt didn't really cover everything - not the best idea in
church! So I've just placed a few bids on eBay, so hopefully I might
have something to wear in a few days time. So far, the shops in
Sheffield have been not too helpful: Next wasn't stocking maternity
until they'd moved to the bigger store in Meadowhall (which might have
been this weekend actually); M&S have a small range in Meadowhall, but
nothing in town; not much at H&M fit me. Any more ideas? Where do
other people find all their nice maternity clothes, without spending
an absolute fortune?

Too much to do!

We're now 17 weeks through, and don't seem to have done anything to
prepare! Help! We've had a brief looks at pushchairs, have got a
long-ish list of names, but that's about it. There's furniture to move
around the house (and the house needs tidying/cleaning before we can
do that), decorating to do, shopping to do, money things to sort
out...

And that's without thinking about the pregnancy and birth, which I
guess should really come first. I've registered for NCT classes, but
haven't heard anything yet. I've just found out about someone in
Sheffield who does pregnancy yoga and Active Birth workshops, so I'm
going to sort that out as well. The more I read, the more I'm
convinced that I want a home birth, so there's things to think about
for that - making sure tings are clean, we've got everything we need
etc etc, and of course a birthing plan. Maybe I'm thinking a bit in
advance, but judging by what I've read you can never start too early!

I know there's about 5 months left, but Christmas is in the middle of
that (thinking money and energy here) and I certainly don't want to
leave everything until the last minute.

Heartbeat

Just been for my second appointment with the midwife. Everything going
OK. Still got some nausea, but I think it's more indigestion than
"morning" sickness, so I need to see the doctor to get a prescription
for Gaviscon to save me buying it all the time. Blood pressure fine,
nothing exciting in my urine, noting else to note.
She said there was only a 50% chance of hearing the heartbeat, but she
could try if I wanted. I wanted! And bless, Bubble is doing well - a
good strong heartbeat for all to hear! That's my baby!

more excitement

We've just come back from the doctor, after Bubbles 15 week appointment with the midwife. We were told that she could have a listen for bubbles heartbeat, but that there was only a 50% chance of hearing it at this point. As it turned out, it was fairly easy to find, and was quite strong. So, not only have we already got its first picture, we've now hear it too!

Bubble burps

The sickness died off a few weeks ago, and I thought that was it for
that. But no - the last few days I've been feeling rough again. The
sea bands have gone back on the wrists and I've been grazing in the
hope of reducing the symptoms. But this time it's accompanied by
Bubble Burps - at least I'm blaming Bubble! So, now Gaviscon has been
added to remedy list. I've only tried it today but, touch wood, things
do seem to be a bit better. Maybe I can get rid of the wrist bands?
But indigestion already? Is that right? Anyway, I'm at the midwife
again next Tuesday, so I'll ask her about it then.

I wish people would stop telling me that "14 weeks is when you start
to bloom"! That's just not happening for me. Spotty skin, still tired
a lot of the time, and feeling fat and sicky. Blooming my arse!

Feeling tired, achy and fat!

Every night I just want to curl up in a ball and go to sleep by about
8.30pm? Is that normal? I'm so tired. Back to school this week as
well, so I don't have a day or two off in the week now either.
School's only mornings, not full days, but it does stop me having a
lie in. Still, after September I'll be back to 2 days pharmacy, rather
than the three I'm doing at the moment, so that'll give me a day back.
Hurrah!

And the achy bit - it's my neck and shoulders. Last Friday I woke up
and could barely move my head. That lasted over the weekend. It's
better than that now - at least I can drive the car and not grimace
every time I move - but I'm still very tense and achy. Dave went on a
mercy mission - bless him - to find a wheat bag, which helps but
doesn't solve the problem. Paracetamol doesn't touch it, and I don't
want to take anything else. I know a lot of it is just that I need to
relax, but that's quite difficult at the moment. Any suggestions?

Now the fat bit - my belly now sticks out as much as my boobs. And
that's saying something! I'm sure I shouldn't be this big at 13 weeks.
And the belly is not even round, it's got a lopsidedness to it. What
am I going to be like at 40 weeks?! Help!!!

The news is out!

I think pretty much everyone must know by now. If you don't, I'm
sorry! Everyone's really excited for us. Maybe more excited than we
are - although we have had a few weeks for the news to settle in.

Now there's so much to think about. We've had offers of stuff from my
brother, so we need to make time to go and see what is lurking in
their cupboards. I've got to think about maternity pay - I don't work
many hours at school, so don't know whether I'll get SMP from there,
and so need to find out what the alternative is for self-employed
people. Dave hasn't got a permanent job yet, so there's that hanging
over us. The list goes on...

At least I'm not really feeling sick any longer. Tired - yes! Brain a
bit scatty - yes! Off bananas - yes! But none of that horrible
sickness malarkey!

It's all now very real!

It's now all very real for us - we've seen the pictures to prove it. Up to now, it's all just been C feeling fat, tired, sick etc, along with the (faint) blue line, but now we've seen the pictures at the first scan, we've seen Bubble's head, body and limbs. He was wriggling about a bit this morning, and we now know everything appears to be OK.

The date we were given tallies exactly with what we thought (it's now 12 wks & 2 days), making the due date in early to mid March next year.

I now have to get on with securing a job to take the pressure from C to earn lots - and that is not proving an easy task! I am working on it, and praying that I'll get to know of suitable opportunities, and that someone will see my potential from the application!

Feeling fat!

What am I? About 10 weeks and already I'm feeling fat. Someone told me
the other day that I'm beginning to show - and we haven't even told
family and friends yet. We've got a few weddings coming up and I
needed something to wear - I've had to buy a maternity dress to make
sure it'll fit me by the last one at the end of October! I just feel
fat and fed up.
We weren't going to tell family and friends until after the scan next
Tuesday, but it's Dad's 60th birthday next Monday and the whole family
is going away for the weekend to Scarborough. It's going to be
impossible to hide it all from them - the feeling sick, the tiredness
and the big tum - so we've decided to tell them when we see them on
Friday. At least that way we can tell before they guess or ask.
Everyone else can wait until after the scan - telling my family is a
case of needs must!

Morning? sickness

Hmm! I don't know about morning - it seems to get worse through the
day. I've only actually been sick once, which I suppose I can be
grateful for. But bananas are off the menu, and I'm eating constantly
throughout the day in an effort to keep the worst of the feeling at
bay. How long does this go on for?

Midwife appointment

Been for the midwife appointment today. Not too exciting really. Just
a load of questions to check on how things are and I guess to
highlight any potential problems, and a load of booklets and leaflets
to bring home to read - it'll take until the baby's born to get
through them all!

Just a slight debate about the dates at the moment. I know when my
last period was, and I also know that they aren't 28-day cycles and
the earliest possible date for conception was. It doesn't exactly fit
with the date they work out from my period - she reckons 10 weeks, but
I reckon it's more like 8-9. It's made all the more confusing by the
fact that the "weeks" aren't counted from conception, but from the
last period, even if your cycle aren't the "perfect" 28 days!

Scan in 2 weeks, so they'll probably try and tel me something different then!